Filling time

Dear readers,

Today is the launch of my new web site, Reflections, a collection of my writings and photographs.  

Those of you who are subscribers to my blog will continue to receive posts regularly from the new web address, barbaraviniar.com. If you’re reading for the first time, please add yourself to the list.

I hope you’ll browse the site and let me know what you think.   

Yours,

Barbara Viniar

For the last two weeks I have been writing about time. In this final post on the subject (for now), I’d like to pick up on the conversation between Krista Tippet and Oliver Burkeman featured in “On Being,” this time focusing on “filling time.”

Shortly before this episode, I had been talking with a friend about how we have become “addicted” to our devices. We no longer just sit, or wait on a line, or even finish a meal, without checking texts or social media, as though something important has occurred in the last few minutes that needs our immediate attention. I am well aware that there are people who are paid a great deal of money to make us feel that way. And yet, as Tippet points out, “It’s not just that we submit to distraction, we throw ourselves at it so readily.”

Last week I wrote about doing chores to avoid writing because writing creates a fear of judgment. Is constantly looking at one’s phone also an avoidance mechanism? Are we afraid to be still, to be alone with ourselves, to think? A few weeks ago, I was driving my daughter’s car. She had just had surgery and was sleeping soundly. I couldn’t get a radio station or find the charger to plug in my phone and listen to my playlists. For three hours I drove in silence. While of course I had to stay alert to my surroundings on the road, it was incredibly restful.  

After a recent virtual book club meeting, my friend pointed out to me that I am frequently looking down on Zoom calls. I have tried hard in the past year to cultivate patience, yet there I was, scrolling on my phone instead of giving others my full attention. Their conversation may not have been as stimulating as I would have liked but was certainly no worse than the majority of what was being tweeted and no excuse for rudeness.  

This is not an advice column on how to cut the cord, just a reflection on the need to liberate ourselves from “filling time.”